Juice Jugglers Gifts

'Tell your mom that the grape juice stain is just your way of marking your territory.'

Children's Parties

Balancing two espresso martinis

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

Stop and Birch

"Ever since the layoffs, I feel like we've been doing the work of twenty clowns."

Medieval headlines.

"Oh just ignore him!...he always shows off when we have visitors!"

"Honey! We're home!"

This one's mixed media--- I had jelly on my hands while finger-painting.

"Life After a Circus Bankruptcy."

A high wire act walks over to a bottle of wine.

The boss and her baby

"Oops! My mistake, that was your projected trial load for this year, not this month."

Working from Home: In/Still In

"I wish I had done more pro bono work. I need the tax write offs."

"Shister and Shyster Attorneys at law"

"As your attorney, Roger, I feel it's my duty to charge you an enormous amount of money."

"I never promised I would get you off. I alleged it."

'It looks like you need to eat a more balanced diet!'

'The Constitution guarantees you a speedy trial -- so hold on tight!'

'I like my plea bargain better. I plead guilty and you dismiss the charges.'

Funky Chef 1

"Stop playing with your food and eat your dinner!"

Swiss army justice.

"Oh I never lose any sleep over my criminal cases. I figure that even if I lose, I'm not the one going to Jail!"

Heyyy, don't worry about a thing. One more energy drink and I'll have you sliced and sutured in no time!

Parole officer: Hanging in and hanging out.

Lawyer, Attorney, Counselor, Barrister, Solicitor

What can I get you? Something light but filling. Flavorful but not too spicy. Healthy but not boring. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Something right in the middle. Neither here nor there. It must walk the line of non-offensive yet opinionated. I wonder if Arby's is taking applications. If I eat a sandwich in the woods and no one is around, do I make a sound?

"When he needs to, Ed can really multitask!"

'This is great. A fruit you can eat, drink and wash your ears with.'

Extreme Coworking Space

'I know your client wants a jury trial, but we can't come up with a jury. People are too busy.'