Joint Juggler Gifts

'Does it hurt when I do this?'

Chiropractor

Children's Parties

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

'She finds it really easy to juggle her kids with her career now she's joined the circus.'

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

"Bed Spread"

Football

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Look Billington, if you can't take the strain, tell me, ok?"

"Why don't you start with tennis balls?!"

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

Stop and Birch

The coffee's not working.

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

'Oh, look - a juggling stilt-walker painting that little child's face!'

Publisher. "The Laws of Motion " is a little dry for a title, Mr. Newton. How about something catchier like "When Push Comes to Shove"?

Juggler and Illusionist

"Wheeeeeeee!"

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

Tennis ball girl.

A woman watches football on her computer.

"I see you haven't forgotten how to play with your balls, honey." "Thanks."

Circus

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

"Really, self-taught - that's remarkable!"

"I'll bet he knows what it's like to be a single working mother."

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'