Joking Jailbird Pillows

What's wrong? You haven't touched your dinner.

"White Collar Prison"

Exhibition for Prisoners

"Regards from the kids, grandma, mom and pop, uncle Fred , Aunt Theresa and cousins Harvey, Flo and Niki. They all want to know where you hid the loot."

'My biggest mistake was to make a 'death-bed confession'... then I made a full recovery!'

"I'm the first one in my family to do time."

'Smooth move -- Now we're in REAL trouble!'

'Sure I do bad things, but I do them in moderation.'

''Where do you see yourself in five years'? That's a stupid question! You know darn well I'll be finishing 5-years of a 25-year sentence!'

"Miss Robins, get me a ladder and a hacksaw, if you will, please."

"The reason I never get any visitors is because all my family and friends are in here!"

'Sweetheart, your calls are slowing my early release.'

'I'm here for jumping my bond... Bail bond.'

'Hey kid, what are you in for?'

'I made good money - until they added colour to the twenty dollar bills.'

'The Not so Great Escape.'

'MY doctor says I don't get out enough!'

"The bad news is Lady Sybil has died in childbirth. On the other hand, Bates is back home and Tom's sticking around to help run the estate."

'Your mother reckons you look like your baby photos now without your dandruff, dear.'

'It's best if you take it one day at a time.'

'Look on the bright side -- we could still be in the MARKET.'

Love in prison.

'It was sort of like a penalty for early withdrawal. The bank hadn't opened yet.'

'When I said 'I'm breaking out,' I meant that the food here is messing with my acne.'

'I've been a burglar, a blackmailer, a mugger, and an armed robber, but by gosh I've never been a LAWYER!'

'Forget about it, we all try it when we arrive here, but it's a concrete floor...'

"I believe thr guv'nor used to own a boarding house in Blackpool."

Con Artist.

"It's no good you hiding, Whacker. Your release date's today and that's final!"

'So what's your recommendation? I suggest a tunnel.'

'There. Now you have the job security you've always wanted.'