Jokester About School Pillows

'And this year's perfect attendance award goes to Sidney Baker... Sidney?... Sidney?...'

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

it's back to school time, Frank. I think I have everything I need. I have a new backpack, pens, pencils, erasers, notebooks and, of course, a mask. We don't need those anymore. Speak for yourself. Zzzzzzz.

"I got all Z's because I fell asleep in class."

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

'Sorry mum, I had a brain freeze during the test...'

'A boy at school was named after his father. They've called him Dad.'

"If I can't use a calculator, may I use my Dad's old slide-rule?"

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

"Class, this is David. He's our new financial exchange student."

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

'Hard or soft science?'

Teacher's pet dog

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

"But, Mom, how can it be a vacation when you're taking me to school?"

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

"No, Bobby, I won't put you on my do not call list."

'It's a guess. I never said it was an educated guess.'

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

Student writing on blackboard - I will not egg the principal's car.

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'