Education Jokes Pillows

Ethics exam cheater.

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

"He wants to study bacteria to relate to the counter culture."

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"If I can't use a calculator, may I use my Dad's old slide-rule?"

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

"Look at her...Gracie is intelligent, optimistic, ambitious..I wish she was one more thing."

Teacher's pet dog

'The first person to learn anything leaves immediately!'

"And then after high school, I spent twelve years in college and majored in procrastination."

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

Old McDonald, first grader, fails English.

Cash For Places - Penbroke College

'It's not a designer pin. It's actually a medal the Principal gave me for backing up my hard drive.'

"It's true that I'm overdrawn but the bribes for improving coursework marks are coming in now!"

'My grades don't look good right now, but I can fix that in Photoshop.'

Remembering the words of his 8th grade Algebra teacher, Moose bought his old middle school and made a mockery out of it.

'Your evaluation is based on what you do in the next 30 seconds. Go!'

"An A-plus in plagiarism! I am so proud of you darling!"

Calculator Jokes

"Tech support? I want to get my grades encrypted."

"Why can I only cross 'right' or 'wrong'? What about 'I don't care', 'I don't give a damn' or 'How should I know'?"

"He's not here to keep someone from breaking in. He's here to keep students from breaking out!"

Mom and child visit principal who has a sign on the door - Nap Time.

"What's a 14-letter word for 'school leader'?"