Jest Junkie Gifts

'And I thought to myself: I spend my life laughing, why not try to make others laugh...'

World Tour.

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Homo Gamus

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

Fast Food Menu Selections

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

Nutrition-Free Diet

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.

'You're not retaining water. You're retaining cookies and ice cream and pizza...'

Covid v Vaccinator

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

Dr. Phil takes it home.

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

Dermatology: Journal of Itchcraft.

Upholding the Law

"Let's take in a trial."

'George always was a hog for fast food.'

"It's time to get the couch gutters cleaned again."

'We can't keep living in the fast-food lane.'

'It doesn't matter if my client is guilty.. the book and movie deals are pouring in!'

'At least he's honest.'

"So that's a triple burger with added cheese and relish... Would you like the complementary angioplasty with that?"