Junky Junkie Gifts

'Got anything more exciting?' - 'Yes, under the counter we have hamburger and chips, beer and chocolate cake.'

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Homo Gamus

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

Running

Fast Food Menu Selections

'We're looking for athletic people.'

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

Nutrition-Free Diet

'Quit fooling around, Gog. Do the assignment.'

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

Jogging...

'You're not retaining water. You're retaining cookies and ice cream and pizza...'

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

Treadmillstone

"Today's special is we'll pull the plug on the jukebox if someone else's music annoys you."

Dr. Phil takes it home.

Upholding the Law

"Let's take it easy for the first two miles."

"Let's take in a trial."

Well you know what they say - here today gone tomorrow - or in the case of dotcoms, here today gone shortly after lunch.

"So that's a triple burger with added cheese and relish... Would you like the complementary angioplasty with that?"

'We can't keep living in the fast-food lane.'

'George always was a hog for fast food.'

'At least he's honest.'