Janitorial Jester Gifts

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

Cleaner Lifts Weights at the Gym

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'Does your mother know you keep a messy office?'

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

Aerodynamics Lecture room.

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'I don't think that's what they mean by reducing the wine.'

'Let's pretend I'm a business owner and you're the janitorial service...'

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

Not much money, glory, or praise

Women in a cross country race

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"The trees are laughing at us."

Husband bakes a pie

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

"Not guilty?"

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

Caution signs.

A baby in court

Elephants never scared me. I once chased three of them into the river/I was able - before I lost my teeth - to bite a crocodile's tail right off / I'll never forget the time I roared so loud, twenty or maybe thirty monkeys fell right out of the tree.

Whittler's Mother.

Yesterday I had an argument with the janitor of my building, and then last night I dreamed that he was chasing me with a large ball-peen hammer

"We are extremely short-staffed here and you would need to be okay with that. For example I’m the janitor, but I also do interviews in between emptying trash cans."

Clown Wedding with Rake

The Janitor at the Harvard University Alumni Reunion is one of the Gang.

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'