Isometrics Gifts

5. Install all equipment carefully. 6. Never increase the weight load of any exercise machine when you are by yourself.

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'Let's not go by the book.'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

In basket-case.

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

Online form - Submit.

In/Out/These Things Happen.

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

Out and In.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

37 years in the same position.

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

Storm in the out tray

'T.M.I.F.'