Island Survivalists Gifts

"I hope that you're not refusing free dental care for ideological reasons."

'Dinner's almost ready, so don't go wandering off.'

"I'd like to announce my candidacy for President of the United States."

'I'm sorry Roland, I'm starving and I'll have to have to eat you...sniff. Roland would have loved those bones.'

"I wish I wasn't a vegetarian. . ."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

Ted did have some concerns about the appearance of nepotism.

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

Emergency Pants

Dear Diary, 36 weeks on this island and I'm starting to feel that I'll never get rescued."

Tsunami Evac Route

'Oh, that's just great. It's not bad enough I'm stranded here. Now I'm trapped in an invisible box.'

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

Shipwrecked Ventriloquist.

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'He needs professional HELP!'

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

"I've never been this excited about an anal probe before!"

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

After 73 days, the coconut would finally be his.

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

A man on a desert island has an inbox and outbox both filled with sand.

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

Desert island has bottle bank and paper bank. Castaway sees message in bottle float towards island.

"No, I don't wanna read your damn blog."

"Well, if you don’t want to discuss exposure, drowning or sharks, what do you want to talk about?"

'What luck!'

"Now do you believe me?"

Shipwrecked with an environmentalist.

'Stop! Wait 'til he finishes cleaning my teeth!'

"Now you can send it."

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

Man on desert island with a sail attached to two coconut trees.

'Are you sure this is just a mirage we're crawling through?'