Irony Admirer Pillows

"Where? Where?"

'You've not been involved with money laundering before have you Joe!'

'Runs completely on electricity - generated by a tiny coal-burning power plant.'

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

'My advice is simple: Never spend more than you steal.'

"Great speech, general. Poor choice of uniform."

"Perhaps sir should try our wolf department."

'It's called 'wild suburban sex orgies', but thats just for marketing...its actually about 17th century basket weaving'

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

'Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth - but not the oil and mineral rights.'

'Scratch yourself a couple of times and call me in the morning.'

"I feel like I'm having some credibility issues."

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

Assertiveness class

Beware of the Dog

'George,remember your New Year's resolution.'

Vasectomy Clinic Waiting Room

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

Sadly Gordon's literal interpretation of the brake shop motto would prove to be his undoing.

'Sidney, what's happened to you? You've become obese!'

"I warned you about apples didn't I ?"

'It must have been a REALLY bad pun!'

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

'The company I ran was non-profit, but that wasn't intentional.'

Two prisoners pull a Christmas cracker, the free gift is a hacksaw.

'The good news is you're going to live, the bad news is you're allergic to cheese.'

'You can't win -- I turned the water into wine, and then everybody wanted free refills!'

'...Sure, I can tell you how to prevent getting old...You can lie about your age...You can smoke...And you can drive drunk...'

Alway finish what you (start)

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

Warning! This sign has sharp edges.

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

Federal Deaprtment of Catch 22.

Life coach...life coach...

Important balloons, $30.