Ironwork Admirer Pillows

'So sorry, I thought you were an Anthony Gormley.'

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

Shoe Shine/Lace Tie

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"Just don’t tell the other vultures. I’ll never hear the end of it."

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Ironing day.

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"Voila!...smooth pastry." (Lady teaching chef to iron dough).

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

'Don't worry it's organic...'

'And then, just to humor the guy I said 'I need a hug', little thinking that the big gorilla would do just that.'

"Here comes the quote unquote dog whisperer."

'Ugh, we've got termites, destructive little pests.'

Met Office: Wet today and dry tomorrow.

As a reformed gunfight, Big Jake vowed never again to use an iron

"Beats me. They put up the sign and went to their panic room."

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

"Hello?"

'The company I ran was non-profit, but that wasn't intentional.'

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

'I'm Bored'

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale