Ironwork Admirer Pillows

'So sorry, I thought you were an Anthony Gormley.'

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"Just don’t tell the other vultures. I’ll never hear the end of it."

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Ironing day.

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"Voila!...smooth pastry." (Lady teaching chef to iron dough).

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

'And then, just to humor the guy I said 'I need a hug', little thinking that the big gorilla would do just that.'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"Here comes the quote unquote dog whisperer."

'Ugh, we've got termites, destructive little pests.'

"Beats me. They put up the sign and went to their panic room."

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

Met Office: Wet today and dry tomorrow.

"Hello?"

As a reformed gunfight, Big Jake vowed never again to use an iron

'The company I ran was non-profit, but that wasn't intentional.'

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

'I'm Bored'