Ironical Storyteller Gifts

'Here's my plan how to break out of here...'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

Swan Fairy Tales

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

The Demise of Tinkerbell

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

"#notguilty."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

After chasing the rabbit for many hours, Buster found himself very far from home indeed.

"Ever since the layoffs, I feel like we've been doing the work of twenty clowns."

The little engine that delegated

"Your records indicate a great deal of early promise however you've apparently become old and bald."

"Once upon a time there was a kind bank manager who found all the money lost in the global financial meltdown, brought world peace, stopped global warming, cured the common cold and discovered Julian Assange is Santa."

How I met your mother

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

My Spam Sketchbook

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

Santa's Helpers

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."

Men dancing