Ironic Critic Gifts

'Your hair is messy,stand up straight. You look unkempt.'

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"Admit it, we're lost."

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

"There are no such things as problems, only opportunities."

Ranked Voting in N.Y.C.

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

'Look, I said I'd bring you the report on micromanaging. Just give me a chance.'

Big business is not evil

"I hope someday someone steals my identity and makes something out of my life."

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

Site of new Super Gamblers Anonymous.

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

"I belong to that heroic little band of unemployed on whom a healthy economy depends."

'I'm glad you're making friends, Darrel.'

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

"I hacked into Santa's computer and discovered we're not on his naughty list. I feel we're letting our generation down."

"We were poor and had the good sense to be miserable."

AI Summit

'Don't call us, we'll call you, inc,'

Man reading 'Bankruptcy for Dummies'.

"I suppose we could burst onto the literary scene."

"Oh, can't complain, but I do."

Meet The Ghostwriter

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

'You've cured my insufferable conceit, Doc -- now I'm perfect!'

Live Flower/Vase Flower - 'Julia?'

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

'Experience is the wonderful knowledge that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.'