Iron Buff Pillows

Metal Defective.

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'You've had enough.'

'Very funny!'

"Can you hurry up with that will? I don't have all day."

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

'The buildings are merging.'

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

'McWit, I'd like to talk to you about your blood classification system.'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

Vincent Van Goth.

Home maintenance

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

'Sorry we don't do black decaf.'

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

The Coffee Tattoo

Planner at work.

Silver Sufferer - husband looking at steam trains on the internet, wife bored in background

"Did you have any problems at the design stage?"

'When you're right, you're right. When you're wrong, you're fired.'

My husband is a world expert, but unfortunately it's only on maganese bronze.

Personnel. You did high-tech work in this railroad job? It was a part-time position --- I was a semi-conductor.

"First, we install proper insulation. Then we call the Museum of Natural History."

I need a 10 foot board. That's 70 feet in dog feet.

'Best bit of winter pipe lagging I've seen for ages...unfortunately, that's just the scaffolding.'

Sharon's more of a do-it-yourselfer.

'Don't worry - all tall buildings sway a little in the wind.'

'So that's what it's for Ethel. It's somewhere to put their spirit level

Scaffolding being put together by glue.

'NASA, Asteroid Watch Dept'