Fire Buff Pillows

Fire Sale.

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

Obsession with the Internet.

Wordplay: Gastropod.

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

'Hey, buddy, do you mind lending me a hand? I appear to be stuck in this thing.'

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

'You've had enough.'

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

Bees v Wasps

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

"To be a bee, or not to be a bee, that is the question."

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

It's Not Easy Being Ant Boy!

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

'D'you have any salt?'

'McWit, I'd like to talk to you about your blood classification system.'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

'Sorry we don't do black decaf.'

"Now calm down Ma'am. If you want to report a murder I'll patch you through to Detective Malone in homicide. This is Sergeant Flanagan....Insecticide!"

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

The Coffee Tattoo