Iphones Pillows

I said: Get me a @#$% coffee! You're healed. What saved you? I was watching the news and I saw you - on my tv - spending the night to buy a new iPhone as soon as they went on sale. Your mindless consumerism made me so @#$% angry, that I spontaneously healed so I could come back here and strangle you! Hand over that &@#$ iPhone, loser! No way, it's keeping you healthy.

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

Elfie Stick

Likes: $2.

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Would you relax? They never look up."

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

Text Culture

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

Giraffe Selfie

City Marathon.

Cellphone Islands

Klimt Kiss Phones

No caption. (On a pirate ship various flags fly, including flags with a skull and crossbones and other banners showing logos from various social media sites. On the boat deck below, a pirate is looking at his cell phone).

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

Screen Time vs Book Time

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"Nuts to you, too."

"Textin’"

Dawing your Cellphone

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

The Modern Novel.

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."