Investment Gambler Gifts

"This quarter we're very bullish on red."

"Things got heated with the Morgans. I may have wagered our car. You're up."

Aggressive growth fund loses money shorting gold.

'At 10:00 you'll be deleting spam. At 10:15 you'll be forwarding jokes. At 10:35 you'll be playing online poker. At noon...'

The stock market sky is falling.

Money mangagement see-saw.

"Mother, I sold the cow for some financial derivatives."

Stockmarket investor's trays 'Up' and 'Down'.

'Are you looking for something in light blue, or dark blue, chips?'

'It's a deal, for $15 an hour, I'll stand in front of your office.'

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

STRIP Hambone: Betting on horse racing with the company payroll

Collapse of 'Corner Men'

At The Clown Bank.

'I'll see your dirty laundry, and raise you six children.'

"I'd get out of the volatile, capricious, irritating stock market. . . but I might miss out on further gains."

'I have to warn you that hills may go up as well as down.'

'Before you get into the market, Mr. Root, we need to test your pain threshold!'

'I'm going to refer you to a doctor. You seem to have developed immunity to winning stocks.'

Test Today. I didn't pass the test but I did beat the point spread.

'My accounts aren't insured, but it's the risk I take for higher interest rates.'

Stock Market - "I suggest you buy Acme Chemicals."

Aggressive investing.

Invested pot of gold in the stock market.

"In the ring, kid. We want you to take a fall in the ring."

Please Help Me Get Back To Buying Risky Stocks On Margin.

Bought Low, Sold Lower.

"Are you sure our off shore holdings are safe?"

"Only another thousand points up and I'm even, honey."

"These investments aren't without risk. Your mailbox might explode with prospectuses."

Boris Johnson and the Stock Market

'Sorry, I've some bad news about your nest egg.'

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just picking up the pieces after a traumatic investment."

'He made a lot of money investing in what he knew - dog biscuit and rawhide bone futures.'

'I've decided to hang in for the long-term. Maybe even all day!'