Investment Commentator Gifts

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

The Shrinking Dollar.

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

Pillaging, formerly Acquisitions Department

"But will it distract the public's attention enough that they mindlessly buy our products?"

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

'That might work as your own personal mission statement. But what we're really shooting for here is something the whole company can get behind.'

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

"Since when did economists become sociologists?!"

"Right now I'm mostly in cash."

"Old economy, new economy - some things never change."

Cold drinks, candy and corporate buyouts.

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

Liquidity Lunch

Euro fall...

'A market ruled by only three companies is bad for the customers and it puts down development and innovation. I would be a strong opponent to such a market, if I didn't own all three companies.'

'The treasury decided to use bob geldof's speechwriter this year!'

'We've had a marginal advance-decline on a near-term buy-out, but no one knows if that translates as a downturn or an up-tick.'

"Today the market closed at exactly the right price, and all buyers and sellers were very happy."

"Brodkin, now that the economy is creating jobs at a faster than expected clip, why don't you go out and find yourself one?"

We're changing from 'tried and true' to 'fly by the seat of our pants'. So, I'm afraid you're out, Tom !

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

Bureau of Inflation.

Credit Crunch: Breakfast for Losers.

Wall Street: Panic, don't panic