Investment Commentator T-Shirts

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'You know the economy's in trouble when the Forbes 400 list of wealthiest Americans only has 350 names on it.'

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

The Shrinking Dollar.

"But will it distract the public's attention enough that they mindlessly buy our products?"

Pillaging, formerly Acquisitions Department

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

'That might work as your own personal mission statement. But what we're really shooting for here is something the whole company can get behind.'

"Old economy, new economy - some things never change."

Cold drinks, candy and corporate buyouts.

Burbank Imposes Parking Fee on RVs

"Since when did economists become sociologists?!"

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

"Right now I'm mostly in cash."

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

Liquidity Lunch

Euro fall...

'The treasury decided to use bob geldof's speechwriter this year!'

'A market ruled by only three companies is bad for the customers and it puts down development and innovation. I would be a strong opponent to such a market, if I didn't own all three companies.'

'We've had a marginal advance-decline on a near-term buy-out, but no one knows if that translates as a downturn or an up-tick.'

"Today the market closed at exactly the right price, and all buyers and sellers were very happy."

We're changing from 'tried and true' to 'fly by the seat of our pants'. So, I'm afraid you're out, Tom !

This next piece is entitled "Concerto No. 2 in C Minor Blues." Sign the economy's hurting everyone.

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

Bureau of Inflation.

News and Magazines. Record Debt. Dollar Down. How can the dollar be weak when we've been giving it such a good workout?

Payroll Dept. My economic anxiety has less to do with the weak dollar than the week's dollars! (Published originally on March 14, 2008.)

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

Wall Street: Panic, don't panic