Internet Philosophers Gifts

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

"We no longer have to hide. Bigfoot hunters now only search for us online. It's going to be lonely around here."

"It's a self-driving skateboard."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'My daughter read on the internet about a hip replacement with free built-in MP3 player,'

'Can you just send the digital copy?'

Information about information about information about information.

I think therefore I am.

Domestic Spying Drones

"I don't know who will be obsolete first, me or my computer."

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"Siri, are Charlie’s parents to blame for his neurosis?"

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

'What does the internet have against my people?'