Internet Crime Aficionado Gifts

Cyber Theft

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

'Instead of jail time, our head of finance chose the stock option.'

Ignorance of the Law

Gangster's To-Do List

'Make it look like an accident.'

"I believe this is a case for Sherlock Holmes..."

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'

Exposed and imprisoned.

A convict escaping during the press scrum

Washing line with robber outfit and swag bag hanging up to dry.

"The robber was about 5' 11"...."

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

'You've not been involved with money laundering before have you Joe!'

'Have you found a precedent? Yes, you did the same crime in 1974.'

'Emotional blackmail.'

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."

"It's a puzzling case, Watson. For all I know, the culprit could be staring me right in the face."

"I'm going out for beef chow mein - want anything?"

You know retail is in a bad way when...

"Little Timmy is big enough to use you burglary tools."

The Continuing Adventures of Mel Hufnagel, Corporate Head-Hunter...

"They're gaining on us - start throwing the doughnuts."

'Brilliant writing, Mr. Fenswick, but I'm afraid we'll have to pass on your 'How to Commit the Perfect Crime'!'

Police are searching for a male between 16 and 25 years, with a silky sheer taupe complexion and a run over his left eye.