Internet Auction Warrior Gifts

Bidder 2 bids £4 - 'Peel bids £5. Take that, Bidder 2.' - 'Bidder 2 bids £6.' - '£8. How you like it now, bitch, eh?!' - 'Bidder 2 bids £9.' - 'Give me the damn 'bread maker'!!!' -

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

E-Baying @ The Moon

"You're stealing from the rich and selling it to the poor on Craigslist?"

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

I e-bay t-shirt.

'Did you auction off our house on eBay?'

'I have the MRI scan of your brain. The right hemisphere is clogged with computer passwords.'

Too many people post comments in the heat of anger. They strike while the ire is hot!

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

'You bought it - you can lie in it!'

"We understand you're not happy with our privacy policy."

'Enough EBAY already!'

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

Come to bed, Snookums. In a minute. Are you still playing Scrabble? And flaming my opponents. I just crushed an eight-year-old by 100 points and then told him his parents don't love him because he's illiterate! How nice you've found a hobby. I feel so nurtured.

"We don't need a digital security guard. Hackers don't actually come to our house."

'Maybe that will teach you not to buy a manure spreader without seeing it first.'

'I'm pleased to announce the newly-created 'Office of Homepage Security' - to protect against computer hackers.'

"I call him auction man - his hair is going, his teeth are going, his sex drive has gone."

"Whatever the politicians might decide, I'm well prepared because I've got enough hate comments for the next five years!"

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

"It's from eBay! I won a cigarette lighter for a 1964 Chevy Impala. I make my dreams come true one bid at a time."

Meta data retention.

Ebaying at the moon.

"Ms Hathaway, I need to test my mettle. Find someone on social media who thinks they can bully me."

'Remember when your identity was stolen? I just bought it back on eBay.'

That night, Andy attempted to start a Twitter revolution.

SOPA supporters regroup.

"Trying to auction me won't work!"