Internet Auction Warrior Gifts

Bidder 2 bids £4 - 'Peel bids £5. Take that, Bidder 2.' - 'Bidder 2 bids £6.' - '£8. How you like it now, bitch, eh?!' - 'Bidder 2 bids £9.' - 'Give me the damn 'bread maker'!!!' -

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

E-Baying @ The Moon

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

I e-bay t-shirt.

'Did you auction off our house on eBay?'

'I have the MRI scan of your brain. The right hemisphere is clogged with computer passwords.'

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

"We understand you're not happy with our privacy policy."

'Enough EBAY already!'

"We don't need a digital security guard. Hackers don't actually come to our house."

'Maybe that will teach you not to buy a manure spreader without seeing it first.'

'I'm pleased to announce the newly-created 'Office of Homepage Security' - to protect against computer hackers.'

"Whatever the politicians might decide, I'm well prepared because I've got enough hate comments for the next five years!"

"I call him auction man - his hair is going, his teeth are going, his sex drive has gone."

'Remember when your identity was stolen? I just bought it back on eBay.'

"Ms Hathaway, I need to test my mettle. Find someone on social media who thinks they can bully me."

Meta data retention.

"Trying to auction me won't work!"

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

SOPA supporters regroup.

The cat had figured out how to work Ebay.