Online Auctioneer Extraordinaire Gifts

"He's just realised that the stuff he bought on Ebay was the stuff he SOLD on Ebay!"

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

E-Baying @ The Moon

"You're stealing from the rich and selling it to the poor on Craigslist?"

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

An early Picasso painting is sold at auction - it is a painting from when Picasso was a child

I e-bay t-shirt.

'Did you auction off our house on eBay?'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"It's called 'Sold'."

"I got it from eBay."

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

I think you just paid £5000 for cricket box, not a box at the cricket.

The Battle of the Pictures.

Titanic iceberg auction

'You bought it - you can lie in it!'

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Moderne Auction Today - This end up!

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

'Of course, some assembly is required. That's why my bid was so low.'

'Enough EBAY already!'

'Now, what am I bid for this original Ough?'

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

'It sold for how much!'

I brake for anything discarded that I can bring to the antiques roadshow.

Leonardo da Vinci painting - $450 million record.

"It's a sad day when we have to sell off National Treasures."

"... $3 million, I have $3 million. Can I get $4 million? Yes, $4 million ..."

'Actually, I'm here just for the wine and cheese.'

'Now, a real collectable to bid on: a signed first edition of The First History of the World.'