Intergalactic Inventor T-Shirts

'Deploy the Candarm and ready the Canafinger.'

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

Alien embryo growing in earth.

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

"Take me to your mechanic."

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

Science fiction fans on other planets

Dancing with the Star Wars

'Kids, today, Xerf brought in a planet that he found. Now if we look at it closely under the microscope, you can still see it's inhabitants scrambling around.'

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Let's f**k up Mars!"

Christmas on Other Planets.

Newborn Cosmonaut

"What gear are we in, biscuit?"

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

'...And you're always complaining about the government's international trade agreements'

An astronaut parties with aliens on the wing of his spaceship.

"Take us to Disneyworld then, if there's time, to your leader."

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

"Wow! - Do all Earth people look as tasty as YOU do?"

The solar system is replaced by sports balls.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed mini-mall site, but that I'm not as familiar with your galaxy's zoning laws as I'd like to be.'

"Remember everybody, this is planet Earth, so whatever you do, don't drink the water!"

Martians looking at Earth - 'One day son, all this will be yours.'

"Did you bring more cars?"

"You used to be way more attractive!"