Intergalactic Thinker T-Shirts

Martians looking at Earth - 'One day son, all this will be yours.'

'We did our part. If they didn't show up, it's their business.'

"That's the beauty of it, son. Aliens could come from a far off galaxy without knowing a thing about earth, but they would understand accounting!"

"I wonder what kind of welcome we'll get on this planet?"

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

"Take me to your mechanic."

An 'out of this-world' soccor player stops the penalty his way!

Dancing with the Star Wars

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

Science fiction fans on other planets

'Kids, today, Xerf brought in a planet that he found. Now if we look at it closely under the microscope, you can still see it's inhabitants scrambling around.'

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

"What gear are we in, biscuit?"

"Let's f**k up Mars!"

Newborn Cosmonaut

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

"We found three sort-of Earthlike planets around a nearby star." "Do you think any of them have video games?" "I've been trying to work out the odds of an intelligent species arising and evolving thumbs capable of holding an X-box controller." "Proof of video games would change everything." "I wonder what the aliens on those planets consider sexy." "Living beings creating simulated beings they can smash is the hallmark of an intelligent species."

Christmas on Other Planets.

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

'...And you're always complaining about the government's international trade agreements'

An astronaut parties with aliens on the wing of his spaceship.

"Take us to Disneyworld then, if there's time, to your leader."

'This should succeed...it's not aimed at anything.'

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

"Wow! - Do all Earth people look as tasty as YOU do?"

"After finally discovering that we exist, you would think you would have something more important to ask than if we had Roku."