Intellectual Comedians Gifts

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

Intelligent people laugh too!

"Je suis Descartes, donc, je pense."

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

Scarcity

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

Archimedes statue with a lever

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding as written and as it would have been written if David Hume had invested in a word processor,

Schrödinger and his cat

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

'What do you mean 'theoretically'? Everything we do is theoretical.'

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

'There are no stupid questions, so let's also agree there are no stupid answers.'

'No, you weren't there. But in your expert opinion as a certified brainiac, do you think he did it?'

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

Physicists disputing whether the clock moves backwards or forwards according to season change.

'In conclusion, I hope you all go out there, get well-paying jobs, and give lots of tax-deductible gifts to our alumni fund.'

A planet like ours - pub quiz dolphin

Axel, I notice you read a lot of highbrow books

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

"The problem is you say Nietzsche and expect everything to be just peachy."

"The studio's asked me to see if I can dumb down some Danielle Steel."

Next semester I have "The Frito-lay

The Nanuit Have 2,027 Words For Snow, But, After Awhile, They Just Talk About Something Else...

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Reviewing a Scientific Paper - Etiquette for References.

'Oh that?... It has nothing to do with the formula; it just makes the whole thing seem less grumpy.'

Auguste Comte

'Heidegger-Hi!'