Inkblot Artist Gifts

"My friends call me Rorschach."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

'That reminds me of the blind date I had last weekend!'

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

'I did it all from memory.'

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

Employment recruitment aptitude test

As a matter of fact, it IS rocket science.

'I see an applicant being hired!'

'It's a foolproof formula for writing grant applications.'

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

"Psychiatric convention"

'Very impressive, Newcombe. Over at Liberal Arts we still have trouble with the multiplication table.'

"I see a psychiatrist holding a Rorschach test."

'Oops, actually, this is a cockroach I squashed the other day.'

"It was an accident! How many times must I apologize?"

Psychological Warfare Target Practice

'Ignore that, my pen leaked...'

"That's the finest vacuum cleaner you've ever designed."

"Here lies Ole Kirk Christiansen. Born 1891. Died 1958. Founder of Lego."

'I think it needs more punctuation.'

Writers Block: "Day 24 and still no typewriter!"

"The hardest thing about winning bouts? The other guy's fists."

Lady cleaning hypothesis off blackboard.

'Oh that?... It has nothing to do with the formula; it just makes the whole thing seem less grumpy.'

'How rude!'

A pen spewing letters

Psychiatric Hogwash...

'I don't understand - he's just as strong as ever.'