Injury Twins Gifts

Man with broken leg in cast.

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

"You go out first. Signal me if it's safe!!"

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"No, that was my twin brother. I was too chicken to cross the road."

'What's the plural of baby?'

"Does it hurt when I do this?"

man juggling career, home and children

'No, I don't believe in life after birth. When you're born, you're born!'

Sloth traffic jam.

"And there we have it, gentlemen! The first full face transplant swap of twins."

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

'I know just how you feel.'

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

'Oh, boy - stereo!'

"...Bug bites, barbecue and lawn mower...and you?"

'I think this fishing injury is more serious than you're letting on!'

'That is one nasty whiplash!'

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

Having spotted the Feglers and their two sets of twins approaching, the Fillmans quickly prepared themselves.

'Actually the twins are not hard to tell apart. When I put them down, the one that cries is Dennis.'

'Very funny!'

'My chiropractor said that since I had the twins my posture has improved.'

'We really should ask the driver of that car for tips on coping with twins.'

Man on treadmill with one leg in a cast.

'I think you're mistaking me for my twin sister.'

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

"For the last time, he didn't steal your identity. He's your twin!"

"The one on the left is Mary-Kate, the one on the right is Ashely. Beware them both."

"I sprained it trying to open my medicine."

Just Do It. Just Did It.

"Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with a nanny state."

I've got sharp pains in my ribs after playing sports.... - 'It's porbably muscular... just take pain killers.' - 'Could it be a cracked rib though?' - 'Possibly.' - 'What would I do if it was a cracked rib?' - 'Take more painkillers.' -