Injuries Gifts

"What happened?" "I kept my eye on the ball."

'I know just how you feel.'

First aid in mountains

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

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"Car accident? No, I volunteered to hold the rope for the pinata at my son's birthday party!"

"Does it hurt when I do this?"

'I think your son is being bullied. He's suffering 80% Chinese wrist burns.'

'Tape it up real tight, Floyd ... and the other ankle too.'

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

"...Bug bites, barbecue and lawn mower...and you?"

'Very funny!'

'I think this fishing injury is more serious than you're letting on!'

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

"Hmm, offhand, I'd say you have a nasty case of tennis elbow!"

'Looks like I might have to rethink the football idea!'

'He tripped over a pavement sign that said 'Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault?' So he called the number and sued them'

"Repetitive strain injury?...theres a lot of it about."

'I like your spirit - nine out of ten people would admit roller-disco wasn't for them!'

'It's an old badminton injury.'

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

"I sprained it trying to open my medicine."

"...And your underpants were unusually clean for someone who got hit by a bus."

Just Do It. Just Did It.

'No broken bones. You're lucky, looks like the tree helped break your fall.'

Please pardon the inconvenience while we remodel.

I've got sharp pains in my ribs after playing sports.... - 'It's porbably muscular... just take pain killers.' - 'Could it be a cracked rib though?' - 'Possibly.' - 'What would I do if it was a cracked rib?' - 'Take more painkillers.' -

'You're getting too old for this game, Scott. ... They say the legs are the first to go.'

You're in luck! I'm the doctor who'll be patching you up after the match.

"Check out my wheels! My doctor said I need it till my leg gets better."

"I raced a train to the level crossing. It was a tie."

'Good news. We've decided to give you the game ball.'

When can you get rid of the crutches? Doctor says now, lawyer says not yet.