Injury Preventionist Gifts

Man who hits finger and screams for help has his mouth bound up instead of his finger by unsympathetic wife.

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

'We don't want to risk having any injuries during spring training.'

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

Chasing Covid Variants

'Tape it up real tight, Floyd ... and the other ankle too.'

I think I pulled something.

"Repetitive strain injury?...theres a lot of it about."

"We're seeing a lot of these Dancing with the Stars type injuries at the moment."

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

'Watch out, you'll get tennis elbow.'

'-and remember,under any circumstances, NO extra time!'

'He's accident prone... he just poked himself in the eye with his safety-glasses!'

"There's no way I would ever let my boys play football...it's just too dangerous....!"

'Now look what you've done!! You've aggravated my CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME!!'

People for the ethical treatment of athletes.

"You know what's about to happen and you still got in the car. But yet I'm called the dummy."

"It's stuck in overdrive. What should I do?"

'He's got bad knees, so the league had to make an exception for him.'

Next time youwant to demonstrate Ronaldo's flying overhead kick to your nephew...use a pen and paper!

"Don't high five the lion again."

Football League: Concussions R US.

"I'd feel more comfortable if you'd use diplomacy."

Golf course

'No, Jerome, that is incorrect... can anyone else demonstrate the proper way to tape a basketball player's ankle?'

Caution: slippery surface.

Football Brain Injuries

'I got distracted and let go...'

Brains on the field.

Your fingers' worst nightmares

Fielder being carried away on stretcher, team mate sympathetically says 'Well held, Tony'

'It might be better all round Privett if you took a month off.'