Injury Preventer Gifts

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

The oil trap.

Penguin lost his appetite because of contaminated fish.

Pick one: ounce of prevention or pound of cure.

"This feels so familiar."

Vaccine shortage in Europe

'What can I say, Carol... I'm whelmed.'

'Tape it up real tight, Floyd ... and the other ankle too.'

'It's an old work injury.'

UK sewage dumps

Man who hits finger and screams for help has his mouth bound up instead of his finger by unsympathetic wife.

'Where'd he go, nurse?'

'Only one side effect - colossal pain...'

"Each time someone enters this house, they'll be doused in antibacterial soap. It's just during the flu season."

Ecology

'Is your house baby-proofed?'

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

'-and remember,under any circumstances, NO extra time!'

'Watch out, you'll get tennis elbow.'

'Any worldly advice?' 'Yep. Don't get up too quickly.'

'Now look what you've done!! You've aggravated my CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME!!'

People for the ethical treatment of athletes.

Attacking COVID

"Listen, you're perfectly safe - it's only a slight cold."

'Careful, it might be a trap...'

Next time youwant to demonstrate Ronaldo's flying overhead kick to your nephew...use a pen and paper!

Cold and Flu Medication.

'No, Jerome, that is incorrect... can anyone else demonstrate the proper way to tape a basketball player's ankle?'