Injury Prevention Nerd Gifts

'No, Jerome, that is incorrect... can anyone else demonstrate the proper way to tape a basketball player's ankle?'

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

'We don't want to risk having any injuries during spring training.'

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

Man in car sees fallen sign on the hood of his car which says, CAUTION sign-holding road worker falls asleep.

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

"Hey, Zorro! You forgot your mask."

'Tape it up real tight, Floyd ... and the other ankle too.'

Insurance company agreeing workers' compensation policy in a demolition company.

Man who hits finger and screams for help has his mouth bound up instead of his finger by unsympathetic wife.

You're right, Mr. Fusco. Your health insurance does cover pre-existing conditions. So, honestly, how long have you been a wolverine?

I think I pulled something.

"We're seeing a lot of these Dancing with the Stars type injuries at the moment."

Man sees danger of death sign. Arrows from sign are locked up.

'I need the welder to fix the guard on that pump.'

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

'-and remember,under any circumstances, NO extra time!'

'Watch out, you'll get tennis elbow.'

'I swear this self driving car is falsifying it's records to avoid an insurance rate hike."

Book in library - 'Crash tests for dummies' (being read by a crash test dummy).

'I'm sorry to disturb you, but new health and safety rules prohibit me from climbing down your chimney.'

'Now look what you've done!! You've aggravated my CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME!!'

People for the ethical treatment of athletes.

I had to drop my health insurance... Thank goodness I still have my beer insurance!

'He's got bad knees, so the league had to make an exception for him.'

CAUTION ANTI-CLIMB PAINT

Jerry, incoming!

Next time youwant to demonstrate Ronaldo's flying overhead kick to your nephew...use a pen and paper!

Idiot Driver Sensor System.

Caution: slippery surface.

Henry ignored his antihistamine's warning to avoid operating dangerous machinery while using it and loses his right foot to the vacuum cleaner.

'I got distracted and let go...'

Brains on the field.