Indulgent Romantics Gifts

Candy Shop and Al's Gym:'We have heart-shaped candies' - 'We fix pear-shaped bodies'.

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

Woman at spa having bath in a Martini cocktail glass.

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

Make your resolutions achievable.

Woman thinking about luxuries.

"Only 35% CACAO? I'll have to eat TWICE as much then!"

"Gucci Firenze 1921"

"Well, hello there yourself!"

"And it was at the moment I realized that the only thing holding me back from culinary excellence was a bucket-load of butter."

Cat Love Ads: "Are you; 'Stubborn, lazy, unfaithful and psychopathic...with no sense of humour?""

Dessert

"Do you know donuts have fewer calories than you? I guess that would explain your muffin top."

'Forget economy! Put us down for every frill you got!'

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

Renaissace Music Lovers

Bangers and Mash

'They opened an ice cream shop by the gym.'

"He's really healthy, except for the grilled cheese."

"Call me sentimental, but if I had to live my life all over again, I wouldn't change a thing."

"I got a bonus for the first time in years. Would it be selfish to spend it on myself instead of on Christmas gifts?"

"I found this fabulous new shop."

"That was good, but less tongue next time."

'Yes, that's all - isn't 1500 calories enough?'

"I've kept both of my New Year's resolutions! Three donuts a day and more time in my pyjamas!"

Easy Come, Easy Go: Big Splenders Club.

Pasta, Cookies, Antacids.

"Why is living my best life so fattening?"

Tinder for dogs