Indoor Heating Gifts

'About the underfloor heating.'

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"She's been so creative lately."

Dog Walking Services

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"Wanna toss the ol' virtual pigskin?"

Electric Blanket.

Cat gets a hole in one

"Must you use the cat's litter box to practice your sand trap swing?"

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

Ball pit

An Eskimo sits in a melting igloo, as a central heating van drives away.

"I want to vacation where we can look at something scenic from some place climate-controlled."

"It's so hard to settle on a office temperature that everybody likes."

'Ah! The great INDOORS!'

Gamers

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

"Today's weather forecast, is very accurate."

'...Pack your bags. When we get indside, we're moving to the cat.'

'Single Heating and Cooling technician in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your furnace & AC.'

'I told you he was smart. He turned a potential hazard into a plaything.'

"You just blinked — I saw you blink first. OK, again. Ready? Go!"

"The bad news is, no walk. The good news is, unlimited belly rubs, chase around the dining room table, salmon for dinner, and you're on my bed tonight."

"He took up birdwatching during lockdown."

Dating... In the age of the coronavirus

'I said he needs an ambulance! Not ambiance!'

Plein Air Painting: Quarantine Edition

'Hey! Who turned up the thermostat!?!'

'Do you notice when it's forty below, people quit kicking the oil companies?'

Natural relaxation in confinement

"OPEC tighten the screws. the Larned A. Corys are ready."