Income Provider Gifts

"I'll say this much for her - she's always been a good provider."

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

Copywriter's blank paper compared to the gridded screen of a content provider.

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

Man Looking Through Window

Income inequality vs Income Diversity.

"The legal people are terrified of litigation but I insisted that we write an apology to the client of the lack of service. . . as long as we don't sent it!"

'Good news and bad... Medical science can't cure you, but we have some marvelous support groups.'

'Ah, I see you made £2,000 more for me this year.'

"They are what keeps me going. You wouldn't believe how expensive it is raising three kids."

"Yes, I know what's going on in the world. That's still no excuse for my Internet being down all day."

"Do you realise 25% of your salary goes to the government?"

Name That Salary

IRS. I made less money this year than last year because I spent six months filling out my tax form!

'Can you make good money as a salesman for our company? Let's put it this way - look around you!'

"Will he ever be able to produce revenue again?"

DIY Bed&Breakfast

"You promised an advance...but this is more of a tactical withdrawal."

'For you, I would go through hell and back, I would anticipate your wishes, I would keep you safe and warm, I would love you forever and a day... Of course, just as long as your income doesn't exceed mine!'

"Call yourself a breadwinner. You're a breadloser."

'The 22% tax I understand, but who gets the other 78%?'

"If we could only harvest the energy of the protesters who oppose nuclear, we wouldn't need a new atomic plant."

"We need a new 'mission statement' to tell clients who we are! I was thinking of 'aspiring to excellence'."

"Of course we pay a living wage....as long as you only live four days a week!"

Last Farrier for 100 Miles.

'Employee health plan? We've added chicken soup to our vending machine.'

"My take-home pay is barely enough to take home."

'I know it's a boring make-work job but I like it because it's a make-salary job.'

When I was a teenager I used to stay out all night chasing girls. Now I have to work all night supporting one!

"It's a drone that locates high paying job openings. Desperation is the mother of invention."

"No, I'm not on a diet! It's just that my husband is not a good provider!"

"Working with the elderly causes all sorts of problems...but she can't retire until she's 69."

"Thanks again. You've got a great house and a fun care provider."