Hypothetical Question Lovers Gifts

Later that night, Tim crept into Andy's cave and coconutted him to death.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"You're fired."

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

Vote Centrist to Keep Things Exactly as Awful as They Are

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

Scarcity

What's normal?

The economy.

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

Our Two Parties, Explained

'Good evening! The debate over animal experiments continues...'

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"Hey, I'm just playing devil's avocado!"

Changing Minds

We need a Europe of U-turns.

Here's the Weird Anti-Terrorist Trash Talk That Stayed on Donald Trump's Cutting Room Floor After the Manchester Attack

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Lord George brings news of the debate

Armageddon

"The president says there isn't a flood. What's the harm in humoring him?" "Hey! Would somebody pull Lindsey up for air?"

Unanimous voting.

Roe v. Wade

Protest

'With these video-phones, there's just too much documentation on all my promises.'

Edmund Burke's 'Reflections on the Revolution in France' haunts Dr Richard Price

Arthur Schopenhauer

'The only cuts we can all agree with are their cutting remarks!'

"At least we agree to disagree."

Tonight: Town Hall Meeting. With free speech, sometimes I think that you get what you pay for!

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

Rock and a Hard Place