Hypnotherapy T-Shirts

'I can see you're going to be a bit of a challenge.'

Hypnotherapy: prices subject to change without conscious notice.

"You will awaken and do some light filing, answer the phone, that sort of thing."

"No, I'm not asleep, but my foot is."

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

Trilby - 'A voice he didn't understand'.

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

"Trust me. Don't do it."

Stockbroker and Psychotherapist: Money won't make you happy and therapy won't make you rich.

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

"Charming, absolutely charming."

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

'You know, if you had one of those bumper stickers, I wouldn't be in doggy-therapy.'

Man in Therapist office sees a sign: Therapy Is Expensive Bubble Wrap Is Cheap You Decide

"You shouldn't have hypnotised him"

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

Free-Floating Anxiety

"I don't know, it's just the whole Dark Ages thing. It's got me down."

'I beleive I have a new approach to psychotherapy, but, like everything else, the FDA tells me it first has to be tested on mice.'

"Talk to me. You have wounds. I have salt."

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

Hypnotoon

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

"...but this is the stuff of dreams Mr Whitley! Dreams."

'Pencil on couch being psycho analysed.'

'I don't really analyse dreams. I analyse why you think your dreams are worth analysing.'

"Dopamine Casino. Gambling that makes you feel like gambling."

"Last night I dreamed I caught my tail."

Vampire Day Job - Hypnotherapist

"You have got to want to change."

'I don't know who I am. I have a donor heart, a donor kidney, a donor liver,a donor cornea, a donor lung...'