Hypnotherapists T-Shirts

"This isn't what I had in mind. . ."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

Trilby - 'A voice he didn't understand'.

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

Stockbroker and Psychotherapist: Money won't make you happy and therapy won't make you rich.

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

"You're completely screwed up."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"The first step is admitting you're a dog."

'You know, if you had one of those bumper stickers, I wouldn't be in doggy-therapy.'

"Look! A dying brain cell! Maybe we should help!...."

"You shouldn't have hypnotised him"

Man in Therapist office sees a sign: Therapy Is Expensive Bubble Wrap Is Cheap You Decide

Free-Floating Anxiety

"I don't know, it's just the whole Dark Ages thing. It's got me down."

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

'I beleive I have a new approach to psychotherapy, but, like everything else, the FDA tells me it first has to be tested on mice.'

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

"Talk to me. You have wounds. I have salt."

Hypnotoon

Don't Take No For an Answer

'I don't really analyse dreams. I analyse why you think your dreams are worth analysing.'

"Dopamine Casino. Gambling that makes you feel like gambling."

'Pencil on couch being psycho analysed.'

"...but this is the stuff of dreams Mr Whitley! Dreams."