Hydrant Enthusiast Gifts

"And it's in a great neighborhood, lots of fire hydrants and no squirrels!"

"He finds it better than mace in distracting dogs."

Dog statue being unveiled at a fire hydrant company opening

Dog reading '101 Hydrants'

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

"There! Now let's hear no more noise about wanting a glass of water!"

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

'Bottled water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!'

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

Life Imitates Arf....

'It's a clear case of dehydration.'

'I don't know art, but I know what I like.'

"He's socially awkward but brilliant in his field."

'No spring cleaning for me: I get a cleaner to come over in winter while we're asleep...'

'So we meet again...'

Man being splashed by cold water under Drive Thru sign that says 'Quick Refresher'.

'You did it! You changed my lovely witches broom into a hybrid!!'

Caution: Jogger Makes Frequent Bathroom Stops

Last Hydrant for 10 Blocks

"I can't stand the way it's taunting us!"

'Ill you knock it off and do what comes naturally?'

High wattage refrigerator bulb cooks food - "Moira, can we get a lower-wattage bulb in here?...this food's all cooked."

"The Yelp reviews of this hydrant are off the charts."

Company watercooler with a sign next to it: Is This Trip Necessary?

'I don't know when I've seen it so humid.'

'What do you think of my new place? It's a 1 bedroom, 3 bathroom.'

"OK so - this might sound kinda crazy - but what do you think of me peeing on you?"

'Poland springs! Poland springs!'

I stay hydrated by slowly drinking eight glasses of water each day. I figure that's one hour less of work I have to do.

'I am sorry, sir, but zee facilities are for zee paying customers only.'

'Your scalp is frost-bitten...Stop putting your head in the refrigerator.'

'Vitamin enriched water...Vitamin enriched water...'

The Source of all water