Humorous Witches Gifts

"Wait a second- is that organic?"

"Here we are."

Late BroomStick

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

Newt sale

"Eye of pie...a**e of rat...p**s of newt."

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

'I tell you, dad, Miss Hamilton is a witch!'

INSTANT GREY HAIR TREATMENT.

'Needs more kale.'

"I can't use this. It's past its spell by date."

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

"His face may be in the gutter, but his bum's looking up at the stars."

Candle Size

"It's not much, but we've made it our own living hell."

"Does my brain look big in this?"

Probably should have cleared my bookshelf before the zoom call...

'Why don't you stop moaning, and be grateful that mother was kind enough to invite us around for a special halloween supper!'

"Is that your resting witch or resting bitch face. . .?"

"You're leaving?" "Yeah, today's kids are so demanding so I've decided to move to a gluten-free, lactose-free, nut-free, sugar-free neighborhood."

"She's definitely had work done on her tail."

"This is a Soul Card. We deduct a small monthly fee, and you get your looks back as long as there is a positive balance."

Santa Claus hitchhikes with a witch.

"It's not sediment, it's my late husband's ashes - he always said he wouldn't mind being drunk when he died."

"I can't right now. I have to pick the kids up then eat them."

'I agree O-positive is rather nice, but my favourite by far is AB-negative...'

"Another unpaid nightshift! Please tell me you at least secured the video rights?"

Message in a Bottle: 'If your reading this my hair do is already ruined.'

"Try splashing me now."

'I use my microwave - faster, easier and no carbon.'

Patrolman writes ticket for witch's broom parked illegally.

'You've come for a facelift, I presume?'

'You'll find that when you're seen on a million-volt electron microscope, you really want to look your best.'

'You wouldn't believe how much broom insurance is if you've had three measly accidents.'

'Billy, your mom's hassling the referee again!'