Humorous Fashion Statement Collector Gifts

The Decoded Fashion Statements of Rhonda Perlmutter III

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"He thought he'd stand out more in a body suit."

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

"Do you do much walking?"

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

The Dandy

"Mmm...'ll take these - they fit like a glove."

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

Hairstyles

Introducing the "people having a great time" turtle-neck! 11% wool 89% fun!

Frock Coat

"I like the suit, but do you have it in a smaller check?"

"Wow! Why do you have no tattoos?"

Gravestone Epitaph - 'One surreal gag too far.'

'Would you knock it off with the 'woulda-coulda-shoulda'!'

'The designer stubble is getting a little out of hand Rasputin!'

'When did you first become a Fruit-of-the-Loom guys groupie?'

Belling the Cat

"This is for a dissatisfaction survey. On a scale of minus one to minus ten, how bad have we made it for you down here?"

Something for Everyone!

"It's not what you think. I'm from South Dakota."

"I can prescribe something for your pain. . . but there's nothing I can do about those boxers!"

"I think we can relax, they're not lumberjacks after all: They're hipsters..."

"Hey - make sure the mask covers his nose."

Titan Arum

Tattoos & Super Powers Removed

'Edward, will you promise that if I die first you won't go crazy and get your nose pierced?'

"Now that is one big ass hat."

'George, when did you grow that stupid moustache?'

I guess Living in my parents basement does sound better than tried to overthrow my dad in a coup.

Man reads a man's tattoos instead of his newspaper.

Fendi Bag Lady

"After 35 years of Diligent service...management present you with this award." -MUG

Why would anyone want to polish a lemon?