Humorous Commentator Gifts

"It's 'Take Your Daughter to Work Day.'"

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

Wifi in Hell

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"‘Click’, you have reached the White House, press 1 for shameless groveling, 2 for presidential pardons, and please have your credit card details ready..."

Nature is going crazy! Extremely hot summers, tornadoes, floods. . .and now Frank comes home sober on a Friday evening at 10 PM!

'Cartoonist thinking'

Ranked Voting in N.Y.C.

A lady playing piano and a man talking to her

'He hasn't played a game yet, but there are people who have started whinging about him already.'

"But the good news is Trump has broken off diplomatic relations with them only on Twitter..."

Sports Radio in Crisis

Sir Patrick Moore.

The National Institute for Advanced Talk-Show Punditry.

Tree of Public Opinion.

"Lord, save my ass from this Russia debacle, please!"

"We've now got a higher approval rating than the media."

Carl Shurz's attacks on President Grant are 'Played Out'

"Can you hear me now?"

And now, for a rebuttal.

'Oh man, he just nailed that triple entendre... that all but guarantees him a medal.'

"There's a programme about people watching TV on the other channel."

"If PBS announcers did football games." "Let's listen carefully to the quarterback as he scans his options. It appears that the defense seems to want to deter his team from moving the ball forward..." "The fans are making so much noise. I wonder if they know how hard that makes it for the players to concentrate?"

"As you can see here - slow the tape, guys - these sparks are coming awfully close to the truck's gas tank, an explosive situation indeed..." Every high speed chase needs a color man.

"Actually, we will replace you."

Chess on TV

The United States of Amazement

Surgery is to be encouraged to set up food banks

"This is gonna be great!"

Sportscasters on the Savannah

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

'Twigs... great, that'll be comfortable.'

'Say what you like about the All Black scrum, but it's clearly the most fragrant and well groomed in the modern game.'

Voice of the GOP

Dear Sadie, How come there never seems to be any penality for pundits who turn out to be wrong all the time?