Humorous Birthday Celebrator Gifts

Birthday Wish

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

"I'm here for the hair."

"Don't think of this birthday as you're getting older. Think of it as being one day closer to irritable bowel syndrome."

'I couldn't remember your exact age.'

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

'ANYTHING to get down the ruddy boozer!'

"I'm not going to do any work...cos it's my birthday!"

Happy Bifurcation Day,

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

Once Again Jeff Had Put Too Much Helium In The Party Balloons.

"This birthday qualified him to be tapped as a fossil fuel reserve."

A woman stares at a birthday cake that has "4,000,000 calories" written on top of it in icing.

A Real Pinata Surprise

'You have the body of a 22 year old man, providing your birthday is February 29th.'

'If there was one thing Methusela hated. It was his Birthday bumps.

I'm 40! Oh. Well happy birthday. A lot of people wouldn't be happy about turning 40. But I'm thrilled! I've been looking forward to my midlife crisis for a long time. I've got it all planned. First I'm going to buy a sports car. Then I'm going to leave my family for someone half my age who really GETS me. Then we're going to embark on a road trip filled with booze, shoplifting and debauchery. Anyway, what's your most dangerous drink? I want something that says "I'm letting the tiger in me out to

"Meanwhile at Oak Vista Rest Home... In case of birthday cake fire break glass."

"It's like every year my fear gets a little worse."

Big Birthday Boy Breakfast.

The first birthday gift.

'I wish I could look just like Elvis.'

'That does it! I've had it with that nincompoop! Every time there's a birthday, he's the first to sign the card and he never leaves room for anyone else!'

Life begins at 60

Happy Birthday!

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

The Big Bad Wolf Turns 50.

'I do hope you enjoy your birthday lie-in, dear.'

"She just uses all that make-up to hide her age."

Alien Birthdays...

"All I got was a cake and a card."

"He hit the big 60 today, and now he's just drooping around the house, convinced that he can hear his arteries hardening."

'I must be getting older, the cards joking about my age just don't seem as funny anymore'

'Born again birthdays don't count.'

A drum covered in candles