Humorist With A Fitness Twist Gifts

"It's an Apple watch I use it to count my step."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

Bench Press Accident

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

Keep Fit.

Old Karate Master

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

'Climbing up a chair to take a bag of potato crisps out of the cupboard five times a day does nor count as exercise, sir!'

"I'm keeping 'up' distance... there's a reason they are called DROPlets."

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

'After the age of fifty the 'c' word always means colonoscopy.'

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

"Cut down on the Ho-Ho's."

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

New anti-obesity cookbook.

Musclesnakes just swallow the dumbbells.

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

"Still on your left."

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

"One slice—hold the bread."

"Eat lots of carrots."

"But why not be happy about all the diseases you don't have?"