Fitness With A Side Of Humor Gifts

"Wanna go scroll on our phones at the gym?"

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

Bench Press Accident

Keep Fit.

Old Karate Master

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"Still on your left."

Musclesnakes just swallow the dumbbells.

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

'Much like my hairline and waistline, our numbers are trending in the wrong direction.'

Jeff was watching his weight.

Fitness Club Founded in 1892

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

'...How much did he pay you to sneak in here and take his fitness test?'

"I said half-moon pose, not full moon!"

If swimming is such a good way to lose weight, how do you explain whales?

Tred carefully mill.

'If you can't get me buff can you at least make me cuddly?'

Maude's yoga classes were beginning to pay off.

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

'No peeking!!' - Learn to Run Classes.

Can't touch my toes without bending my knees, doctor!

"I am exercising. I'm doing some online walking around an online mall."

Check out my six pack.

Pontius Pilates

Plan B

"Remember to keep hydrated, tell me when you want more Prosecco."

'Swimming back to the mainland to see some football game is stupid. Besides you're so out of shape, you wouldn't get 10 feet.'