Humorist In Romance Gifts

Lisa, will you marry me... and if so promise not to go nuts planning the wedding.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

This next song goes out to the girl who stole my heart and my guitar.

"You really ought to cut down on your scream time."

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

"I said I'd give you the world, didn't I?"

'Well, thanks, but we have no need of a Divorce Lawyer: We're Lovebirds you see...'

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

Sexual chemistry set

"I'm Lester Holt, and this, is date night."

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

"Yo, Ned Beatty, paddle harder if you ever want to kiss me again."

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

When at a loss for words Colin would often resort to communicating through the medium of contemporary dance.

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

'The way we met was interesting. I opened my wallet and there she was!'

'Don't blame me -- You're the one who had to have more personal space!'

"I love a woman with a sense of humour."

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

Tunnel of Temporary Infatuation

Always Compatible

I think you'll find that I'm easily encouraged. For instance, the fact that the two exclamation points above your head are tempered by one question mark gives me great hope. !?!

"I've learned something about you tonight, Alan. You say 'chowmein' when you mean 'lomein'."

Tunnel of Like.