Humor-loving Host Gifts

'You ordered the stuffed sea bass, didn't you?'

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

Pinata Trophies

Teacher's sign in Philosophy class reads: 'Think', Sign in Science class reads 'Thunk' as student falls over.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

"Maybe if we had better teachers we could learn new tricks."

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

"There's a programme about people watching TV on the other channel."

Roller Coasters

Scientist discover a new superbug

"Good grief, Bradbury! How long have you been working at home?"

Dave :)

'What colour is a hiccup?'

Valentines Day Cats

"They should've called me for the sketch instead. She's not even funny. What a complete bomb-ala."

An elderly woman with a heart-shaped ear trumpet

Although a rare sight in the old west, the secluded ice rinks brought out a side of the lone passing-by cowboy, that even they themselves barely knew existed.

"Could you put me 'on hold' Mom? I could use a hug."

"Look, I'm bored, you're bored – why don't you let me go down there and shake things up a bit?"

"The viewers seem to be sated with stupid shows, senseless movies and embarrassing celebs. That's why our black screen has got the best viewing figures!"

'Don't make me use my chemical weapons...'

"I love what you've done with that punch bowl Reginald!"

I've got a gun.

'Fancy a banana split?'

'I take it you're new to painting miniatures?'

'Every Hallowe'en barbeque he goes way over the top!'

Extreme Accounting!

"Evenin' gents - what's yer poison..?"

"Sorry kiddo, I might be a "Magical Creature", but I don't know any magic trick..."

'Why do we always talk about this stuff?'

"And in this corner...for the time being..."

Short Term Memory Loss Centre

Silly Seasoning