Household Task Enthusiast Gifts

"How much would you charge to get my husband to love taking out the garbage?"

Kitchen Tetris

"Drunk, yet orderly"

Washing Line Walker

"How did you get him to do housework?"

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

"Your next pilgrimage must be to a bodega for milk."

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'

A Visit From The Procrastination Muse

"Shall I kiss it better?"

Giraffe holding up the washing line.

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

Looks like I do dishes again.

'Henry, just break down and buy a power drill.'

'Sir! We're all doomed! It's a fitted sheet! How can we ever hope to stop something we can't even fold?!'

"Hola...I was wondering if you need your lawn mowed."

Harry believed in having the right tool for the wrong job.

"Just empty it."

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

"You will awaken and do some light filing, answer the phone, that sort of thing."

To Do List.

"Glimmo" Washing Powder - Economy Size!

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

"Harolds been keeping busy tinkering in the backyard." (woman on the phone talking while husband is in the backyard building a rocket ship)

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

'The meaning of life? Sorry, kid, you're on the wrong mountain - I'm the guru of handy household tips!'

'Don't bother your father. He tried to fold a fitted sheet.'

'Well, dear, I did tell you to stay out of my way when I'm vacuuming!'

"I have to help my parents take a boring trip down memory lane...I mean...clean out the attic."

Multi tasking, zero tasking

"My wife also likes DIY... Every time I want to have sex with her, she says - do it yourself!"