Household Product Enthusiasts Pillows

New Sheik'n'vac magic carpet freshners.

"I didn't spark joy."

"You're welcome."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"My dang neck is killin' me again." "That's because you left your dang hanger in your coat. Again."

“I’m stayin’ home — I want the world to know — I pro-bab-ly won’t go!”

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

Living together, couple in love.

Cat being licked by plant.

Live, laugh, love

Meanwhile back at the pond 'Wow... nice pad man!'

How the cords get all tangles up when you're away.

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

'It's a prize for being first to go home.'

'Are you the Octomom who needs a new house?'

"Nice, but it's still a fish bowl. We'd like something with a little more privacy."

'Water is included with rent.'

Homeowners.

Appliance Theatre

American Flag

You wake up and face the crack of dawn. I wake up and face the crack of Ralph.

Coming Home

Cut out and keep your own Butler.

Man climbing mountain with sink plungers.

"Ooh, nice! Hardwood floors!"

'You've got mail.'

Some people might think that having to listen to Colin's 'History of the Wooden Spatula' constitutes cruel and unusual punishment.

"He built his own steps. Apparently, he's loving, smart and impatient."

Things you did wrong today...

The Brook-Green Volunteer Pt. 8

"What 'Do-not-knock' list?"

'The meaning of life? Sorry, kid, you're on the wrong mountain - I'm the guru of handy household tips!'

'Gentlemen, please!! That was just our first offer!!'

"We thought it would be nice to invite the subcontractors to the housewarming."